We hope you enjoyed our privacy law personality quiz and that it brought a little humor to your April Fool's Day. Below is the complete list of what your result could have been, had you chosen differently.
Complex and tough to crack. Only the most sophisticated people deal with you because your multiple layers are hard to unravel. You are both vague and precise at the same. Somehow that emo kid from 1996 has grown up to command a squad of hard knocks (OCR) and no one dares to ignore you because you will launch an investigation or an audit in a heartbeat. Dang! Congrats on being HIPAA than the rest of those wannabe privacy laws out there.
You break new grounds effortlessly. Like BIPA, with its ties to Chicago, you are an OG. No, not an “original gangsta,” but “original guidance.” You lead the pack and are not a follower (::cough:: Washington and Texas). You believe in empowering those around you by giving them a mechanism to stand up for themselves. You are clear in what you want and those ideals are non-negotiable! Keep doing you!
You are a saint. You’ve been one for over 20 years. You are a humanitarian who cares about protecting people (so long as they are 12 and under). Heck, some of the kids you were protecting now have their own babies to stress about. You believe the children are the future (except for those who are 13-17 because why should you focus on the ages when kids are most likely to be online, am I right?). And under your care, they can look forward to a future where their personal information (from 0-12 years of age) was kept secure and confidential.
You have ambition and you throw everything into meeting your sometimes ill-defined goals. You have visions of grandeur. You still consider yourself a revolutionary, notwithstanding that you borrowed elements of your personality from your much cooler European cousin. You can be shallow at times, but people often overlook your deep thinking (e.g. how you define a third party as what it is not, versus just telling us what it is). But no sweat, the next iteration of yourself, coming in 2023, will make a bang! But just remember, that while self-reinvention is sometimes as good as the original (Artist Formerly Known as Prince), more often than not, it leaves people confused about who you really are (Puff Daddy, Diddy, Puff, Love, etc.)
Yes, technically the fair information practice principles is not a privacy law. But like you, it is built on a foundation of sound principles beckoning others to join the good fight. Like a Jedi master, you try to steer others towards making ethical decisions. Like the FIPPs, your efforts have inspired the creation of some good laws. However, for all the light you bring, there is always some sith company out there plotting to extinguish your efforts! Still, fear not should you— the last Jedi, a.k.a. national privacy law, is coming to give us a new hope!
As can be expected, you are a true renaissance person. A thought leader. So many have tried to copy your effortless style (which at the moment consists of a skinny-well-tailored pant that skims your ankle and complements your unassuming looking, yet insanely expensive, sneakers). But your impeccable style shouldn’t distract from the substance, since a law—er…person with no principles is just a fraud. And that is how you feel about all those copycats across the pond. There’s only one you and those with taste (or who are afraid of the authority you wield) know you can’t call it GDPR unless it’s from the General Data Protection region of France, otherwise it’s just sparkling privacy regulation.
You are not overly exciting. Not overly interesting. Not overly demanding. You’re not flashy, you kind of just…are. But don’t worry. You may not be Willy Wonka with all the flair and fancy candies, but you’re Grandpa Joe. And what do we love about Grandpa Joe? He shows up when it matters. Just like GLBA shows up when someone needs an exception from say. . .an overly ambitious law that claims to protect the privacy rights of consumers in California, but is really just a bully. So there you go! You protect others from the big bad wolf! Need an exception, who you gonna call? You’re all business when the time is right. Yes, we’re mixing stories and metaphors. But grandparents love stories, so you of all people will understand.
Look, what else is there to say here? You talk a good game and have a lot of ideas; but when you sit down to do a project, your internal conflicts prevent you from getting things done. Some say you have impostor syndrome and the paralysis that comes with that. No matter how great you are, you can’t help but strive for perfection and so you never actually get anything done. But here’s the thing, you have so much potential and a solid foundation on which to build greatness. So keep striving! We, and many residents of Washington State, are rooting for you!